idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
