He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
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