The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
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