I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
