i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
I wish you could order shots online.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
Omg I joined a choir last night...
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