Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
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