If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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