your parents love me but you hate me
Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My bed is full of blood and feathers
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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