Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
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