please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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