maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize
