You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
Randomize
