Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize