take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
