Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
you had me at cake vodka
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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