Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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