it wasn't lemon gatorade
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
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