good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Randomize
