You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
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