just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
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