if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
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