i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
These 25 People Believed Fake Facts For Way Too Long
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
23 Adults Confess The Irrational Fears They Had When They Were Kids
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home