...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Randomize
