i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
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