someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
I smell like Dick and happiness
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize
