Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
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