I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
