TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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