I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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