Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
they need to just BURY HIM!
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
she pinky promised me she was 18
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Randomize
