I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
