There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
