i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
