So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
Randomize
