dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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