Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
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