maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize
