she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Randomize
