i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
