i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
