we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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