She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Randomize
