There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
Randomize
