I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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