No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize
