Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
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I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
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