i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
Randomize
