okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
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Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
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My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
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