I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Randomize
