One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
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